so in a way at this age i can say,
that most of the times "i know what to expect...
o lo que es lo mismo... lo que no debo esperar (en español)"
and even though it's two different things as far as the way they are written in the end it means the same.
When losing something as a child i remember the first was to look for it frenetically, everywhere probably crying in desperation, then looking for it backwards going step by step thru the things i did before i it went missing, and eventually giving up knowing (accepting) i wouldn't find it.
So after thinking about it everyday and thinking you know where it is, and going back to look for it, you realize you really don't know and finally you give up for real.
As time passes the day least expected you bump into it, you kick something and there it is, as you are about to throw things away you see it and rush to pick it up; of course it has lost
it's shine and pieces are missing.
When you've lost something for the first time you start looking for the pieces and try to wipe of the dust, if it's not the first time you just look over the trash or take a quick look to where you found it, knowing that there's nothing else to be found, no questions to be answered and certainly no one else to blame but you.
